Sunday, 14 March 2010

Our "Brave Heart" has gone to heaven.

My cousin’s beloved son R, has tragically collapsed and died. At the tender young age of 29. Our small family has lost a hero and heaven has gained an Angel.

His Mum told us the awful news we were all dreading, today on Mothers day in the UK, of all days. She was understandably devastated and said she will never ever get over his tragic death.
How she is going to be able to break the news to her Mum who has dementia and dotes on her grandchild I cannot begin to imagine, the pain they must all be experiencing.

He had been through so many challenges in his short life. I wrote about him and his dear Mum in my previous blog “A Mothers love”, we were all praying for a miracle, now he has gone and his family are completely shattered. Our tears feel like they will never stop.

He had Leukaemia at the age of 9. He received the most wonderful care and he and his family were supported brilliantly by “Leukemia Busters” the children's leukemia research charity

The life saving therapy and medication he received as a child unfortunately had many terrible side effects, some of which had weakened his heart. At 18 his heart become so bad he was advised he needed a heart transplant. He agonised over the difficult decision. In the end he had little choice but to agree as he had become so seriously ill, he was given only a short time to live. How difficult it must have been for him to decide what to do. How would he feel having another persons heart beating inside him? I digress but I think about how I have found my journey very spiritual and what happens to our soul if we find ourselves going through such a process and wonder if this played a small part in his concerns. His biggest worry must have been that in agreeing to the heart transplant they were all made aware that the new heart would only have a limited life span before it would become very tired, a period of approximately 10 years. Life is so precious.

For him to have a chance of extending his life at that time, another family had suffered a terrible loss. It must have been so hard and so brave of the family of the donor to agree to the life saving organ donation in their hours of grief. If you have not joined the organ donation register you can apply here for the UK

"R" survived the heart transplant only to have the leukaemia come back once more. Again his spirit and the brilliant medical care he received pulled him through. He and his family cherished each day never knowing what might happen. He loved playing sports with his Dad. He gave up his job in a shop and followed his dream of becoming a DJ. It would have been understandable had his parents become over protective but they allowed him to flourish. He lived life as best he could, to the full. He had lots of friends. He had the most amazing smile and was a big hit with the girls and had many admirers.

When I think of those who are sadly rejected by their family, their loved ones, over needing to make life saving / life changing decisions or are shunned for following their dreams, I think of the courage Richard and his family showed by living each day to the max with complete love and support.

Sadly last week he became ill watching football with his family, something he always loved doing. He was rushed to a specialist hospital only to collapse once more. His brave heart could take no more. His life which began only a short time ago in 1989 has been tragically ended. He will never ever be forgotten. He truly touched so many of our hearts.

My thoughts are with my beloved Cousin's son "R", my devastated Cousin, her husband and his brother at this time.

Rest in Peace dear R.
Today heaven has a new Angel, a true Saint with the bravest of hearts

Debbie xxxxxxxx


Anji said...

I'm sorry that you had such sad news on today of all days. We're thinking of you all.

Debbie K said...

Bless you Anji

rachel laura said...

oh honey thats soo sad ! there isn't much I can say that you havent said so eloquently in you post. a huge hug goes out to you and yours. xxx Rachel

Debbie K said...

My cousins phone call will live with me for ever. Her heart broken words. I think of how my parents had gone thro an awful grieving process for the person they believed was their son, but no one had died, yet their pain was immense and real! How must poor Richard have felt how on earth can his parents come to terms with the loss of such a wonderful brave son?

Jess said...

Oh dear, so sorry to hear this Debbie - your family will be in my prayers.

Lucy Melford said...

He was indeed a brave young man. 29 is too young to die. I can't imagine how it must have been for him, to live with impending death. And how his is poor family must have felt, for all that time, watching him, and waiting for what - bar a miracle - must eventually come. It's so tragic.


chrissie said...

Oh gosh, petal..

My thougths are with you and all your family.


Anonymous said...

You are all in my thoughts.

Debbie K said...

Thank you so much Anji, Rachel, Jess, Lucy, Chrissie and Lisa for your kind words.
They are truly appreciated.

毅力 said...