Saturday, 28 June 2008


The last week has been a really exciting time for me. Lots of positive experiences. As the sweet Rebecca mentioned recently in her blog “gender euphoria”. I like that expression. It has been such a joy to read of so many of my friends in "sparkling form" this week after our recent experiences on the rollercoaster of emotions. True friends are so important & so valuable. Sharing our good & bad times, always knowing they are there for us. Bless each & everyone of you.

I had started this week with my confidence wobbly & feeling more than a little fragile.

I have so much to look forward to yet I often dwell to long on my past. Certain events, certain places, situations evoke all kinds of emotions. It seems crazy how my mind often remembers some things from my past really easily & just forgets more recent events. I have suffered in the past with panic attacks & had severe problems with confidence in just about everything about my life.

This negative mind set is thankfully beginning to change. Sometimes I take a while to see quite how significant the improvements have been. There is such a lot going on in my life just now. The pace of life in this country seems to be getting quicker & quicker for everyone. The photo is of a lazy day on the magical Okavango. A beautiful wilderness just about as far away from the rat race as you can imagine. Briefly zipping along at speed but always stopping to appreciate the true beauty in the world. Sometimes our lives are so out of control & rushed we fail to stop & appreciate the simple things in life. Take me for example "I'm simple" & I never used to appreciate the world around me. I will never ever forget the privelidge I had to go to Botswana but right now I would not swap places with a seat on another trip to that incredible wilderness, with where I am in my life just now.

My plans for painting have gone on the back burner. So much has happened this week. I have so much I want to blog about I will try to break it down into separate stories for each day. That Euphoria is melting my keyboard not to mention my senses.



Anji said...

I was away from the computer for a few days and missed all of your posts!

It's very easy to dwell on the negative memories in the past. I remember Rabbi Blue saying once that it is a bad habit to get into. since then I've made a big effort to let the past go and look to the future with confidence. I see you are doing the same!

Debbie K said...

Hi Anji
I am trying to move on but its not something I have fully mastered yet. Rabbi Blue is a very wise man.